Gig for free? nope

Okay, when I first moved here and didn’t know anyone, things were different… But it’s been 2 years now, and I don’t have to do that crap anymore, so listen up: 
Please don’t ask me to play piano for your show “FOR FREE”. 
-I don’t care about a “networking” opportunity if its networking with people that can’t afford to pay their musicians
-I don’t care about being part of a new project. I have my plenty of own projects
-I’m not going to “do it for fun”. I already have lots of fun
-I’m not going to do it for dinner/drinks. That’s bullshit.
-I’m not going to do it as a “favor” (unless you’re like my best friend… but quite honestly, my best friends would pay me anyways, because we respect each other careers, and don’t try to take advantage of each other)
From now on, you pay me, or I don’t play. Good luck finding a good pianist.

-if you’re Daniel Radcliffe
-if I really, really actually want to do your show for whatever reasons, and want to prove myself

Seriously, don’t ask. It’s offensive.